Journal with Witch Ep 10

Asa has taken Makio’s advice to heart, and has completely thrown herself into looking for inspiration all around her. Starting with the first thing Makio had recommended to her, expand her vocabulary. So she’s been identifying everything around her, from objects, to emotions, and keywords that stick out to her. Among the vocabulary she’s been picking up, the word “Curse” is the one that she’s always circling back to. It first came about when Makio was talking with Shingo on speaker, and Makio had referred to hoping he’d break free of “that” curse.

And that’s sort of the theme of the day, a curse that’s haunting everyone, and we see it take shape in different ways.

While heading out Asa’s classmate expressed concern about Tamashiro (a girl known for previously being heavily bullied) for not laying low. She’s worried about how being a part of the popular kids circle could come back to bite her, since they never know when their standing might change. To that part, I get where she’s coming from, but at the same time, it’s also very likely that she wants to be in the popular circle in order to protect herself. It is admittedly a gamble, as it really depends on the type of people she had surrounded herself with, but just as much as it could potentially hurt her it can be argued that by raising her status is undoubtedly another way of protecting herself. It could also be seen as resilience, for choosing not to keep her head down and blending with the crowd, but willingly standing out to show she’s strong enough to do just that.

Interestingly this was followed up with Asa choosing not to audition for the lead vocalist role. The opportunity had come out where no applications required, but rather than being excited about it, Asa was more disappointed that her fellow first years decidedly ditched their convictions to create an original song in favour for a chance to fast-pass to a lead position. Understandably so, especially since they all seemed to be on the same page about it. It’s certainly a turn of events considering she was desperate to be in the spotlight earlier on, but now she’s bailing out under the pretense that she doesn’t like to perform in front of crowds (claiming this is why she chose to learn how to play bass). Whether that’s actually the truth, or she took to heart of the other girl’s words about how it would actually be better to lay low after her initial failure to stand out, there is one thing for certain. Out of all her choices, Asa decided to continue soul searching and pouring all of that energy into forming lyrics. And it has proved to be best for her mental health, as she had pressed on long enough to get tired of getting mad.

Though on the subject of getting mad: It seems Asa has encountered a huge source of inspiration, one that comes from Chiyo (fellow classmate) who’s been working tirelessly to get the best or perfect scores in order to increase the odds of getting into the university of choice. It came about when she had an outburst in class when an article had come out about Nitto Medical University being accused of Arbitrary Manipulation by deducting ‘uniform points’ for female applicants. In other words, she could be rejected from the university for simply being a girl, and to her words: She’s not about to let this one go. She’s furious, and justifiably so.

This also circles back to a somewhat a topic that was more subtly popping up over the course of the episode: Sexism. The first one emerged when Shingo’s father was being rude to the nurses after being admitted to the hospital. The second was when Emiri was having breakfast, and not only her father wouldn’t get up to make his own breakfast, but on the news they were talking about scientists and the men on the show made a comment about how, ‘someone that pretty works in science,’ and ‘the woman’s dress under the lab coat is a “nice sight”. Her father chuckled on how that commented would be ‘sexual harassment’ in this day and age, but Emiri corrects him by pointing out that kind of thing as ALWAYS been a form of harassment. The difference is that it has only been recently acknowledge and rightfully criticized for it.

Speaking of Emiri, it was particularly interesting to see a different side of her this week. She’s very much in-tuned with Makio, in a way she understands a lot of the things she says, and can identify with it very well. Such was the case when she didn’t respond to Asa messaging her. Not because she was trying to ignore her, but as Makio later explained to Asa when she asked why Makio doesn’t answer texts: It’s to protect her peace.

And I’m glad that Asa actually sought for Makio’s perspective. This is something a lot of people don’t or just can’t understand why sometimes people don’t respond right away isn’t necessarily because they are ghosting them, or that they don’t’ care (though unfortunately that can be the case sometimes), but because they need space. It’s not selfish to try and protect your own peace in situations where you need to prioritize your own needs, or even be looking out for your own mental health. Sometimes, some things are just too much to handle and even in dire situations when someone needs them to be there for them, the other party may not be in the mental capacity to be there for them. It’s hard, ugly and messy, but it doesn’t have to be if both parties understand the other well enough to pick up on that.

Such was the case when Emiri also revealed there’s a part of her that feels like she’s locked to Asa for life. Their families were close, so it hit hard when Asa broke the news to her about their deaths, but it also gets to the point it’s a lot and it overwhelms her. That’s why there’s been times when she wish she could just quit being her friend, but despite having thoughts like that, she hasn’t given up, and she has no plans of doing so either. But this is precisely why it’s so important for Emiri to be able to safely enter and leave her own bubble when she needs to decompress and think just about herself for an exchange. And we saw this when she was hanging out with a friend who attends an all girls’ school. And it looks like we may have finally found out who Emiri has found herself attracted to, and it appears to be mutual! The subtle way of brushing their feet and fingers against each other, and ‘I like that part about you’ and the blushing. After that meetup, Emiri looked refreshed again after hanging out with her!

Now also approaching a year since her parents had passed, and Asa’s a lot calmer about it now but even she isn’t sure whether they should do anything about it. But at the same time, when reminded by her mother about the upcoming anniversary of their deaths, she realized that she had completely forgotten to ask when Asa’s birthday was, and missed it back in September. Asa just shrugged it off when she brought it up since she figured maybe in this household birthdays wasn’t a think to celebrate just as Makio didn’t do anything for her own. That of course is not the case, and Makio felt genuinely ashamed for having missed it. Which is why she wants to make up for by having a little party to celebrate their first year living together.

Last but not least, that also leads to another topic that was a focal point this week: Some connections will never fade. Just as Emiri feels like she’s locked to being Asa’s friend for life, Asa has become someone irreplaceable to Makio. The bond they’ve formed will continue to thrive even after she grows up and begins living independently.