Yagate Kimi ni Naru Episode 6: Words Kept Repressed/Words Used to Repress

Finally! I was waiting for something to happen in this show, and this episode was amazing. There was drama to move the plot, to add to Nanami’s character, and drama that brought the main pair’s relationship to a new light. Lots of things in this episode were great, but that scene on the river was gorgeous.

It seems that Sayaka is starting to show her true colors. The student council show is being brought up again, and the problem that they’re facing is actually getting a script. Usually the literature club would help them in writing the script in the past, but the lit club this time is only focused on reading and not writing so now they’re in a bind in finding someone that can write one for them. Of course Koito knows the perfect person in her friend Koyomi, whose novel she ended up enjoying. But when asked, she never brought her up. But Sayaka noticed her reluctant response. In fact, she’s been noticing a lot of things and I have an inkling that Sayaka may know that Nanami views Koito more than just a kouhai. Sayaka confronts Koito about why she didn’t bring her friend up into the conversation, and why she’s getting in the way of sabotaging what Nanami wants. Sayaka’s jealousy was really ramped up this time, but we had already seen signs of this jealousy from the very beginning when Nanami had chosen Koito to help her with the president campaign. At first it seemed like she was a sweet person, but revealing who she is now and that “she has me to take care of her”, I think it was more that Sayaka shut her mouth and helped Koito with the speech not to help her, but to help Nanami since becoming student council president was something Nanami really wanted. Like I had said before about Sayaka, I understand her jealousy. Koito literally comes out of nowhere and Nanami trusts her with more things than with Sayaka, and all of a sudden Sayaka is kind of cast off to the side since most of Nanami’s attention is on Koito. It’s a crappy feeling for sure, and now Sayaka has made it pretty clear that she holds some animosity towards Koito, and that she doesn’t need to worry about Nanami so much because she’s there for her. I’d love an episode dedicated to Sayaka and Nanami, I think it’d be real interesting for Sayaka to let her real feelings out.

Before leaving, Sayaka drops a little hint on Koito about why Nanami is so obsessed with this student council play and mentions the president seven years ago. This grabs Koito’s decision and makes her snoop around the files in the student council room and main office, but she can’t find any records for seven years ago. It’s very strange and suspicious, but Koito gets the idea to ask her sister. Someone she knows graduated from the school at that time and when her sister asked, the person replied that the person who was student council president back then was a Mio Nanami. The older sister to our black-haired beauty. Koito goes to ask the teacher and finds out that Nanami’s sister was well-loved among the school and that Nanami is like a twin of her, and I knew what direction this was going. Her sister had wanted to do the show, but that year she had died in a traffic accident and was never able to do the show because she died before the culture festival. That day, Koito decides to confront Nanami about it.

This made Nanami way more interesting to me. This whole episode put the show back on track for me. To me, the show was feeling slow and boring, where nothing was really getting done. But this episode really changed that. Nanami’s cold response of “I’d rather die than hear those words” really shocked me, because of how cold it was. This scene on the river was brilliant, as the more they spoke, the farther away Nanami separated herself from Koito by jumping on the rocks. It visually showed their distance from each other in their views on the conversation, Koito worrying about Nanami for becoming a carbon copy of her sister. After her sister had passed, she was pressured from her family to hold her head up high and live on for her sister (which is pretty terrible). Changing from her timid personality to this confident girl wasn’t really for her own benefit to better herself, but to uphold the expectations of her family and to honor her sister. That when she started changing, she got positive comments from her family, such as her being “special”. Again, this is fucking terrible. And to honor her sister, she decided to grow up like her, becoming student council president like her, and create the play like her sister had wanted to before passing. At this point, Koito is scared that Nanami is going to slip away from her so with some manipulation, she tells Nanami that if she weren’t so lonely, then she wouldn’t seek out a relationship. As Koito jumps along the rocks to get closer, she promises Nanami that she’ll stay by her side. Nanami, with every promise she makes, jumps back on the rocks to get closer to Koito, showing that the temporary tension and distance between them is gone, and their relationship is still as strong as ever.

But things are a lot more complicated now. While the scene was sweet, Koito’s intentions were clear. If Nanami leaves, who is she going to use to learn how to love? And to be even more clear, Koito is in love with Nanami as she’s admitted to herself. But she purposely lied to her. The hand-holding scene being shown twice from both their perspectives was perfection, leaving the episode on a darker note as we learned both their intentions.

They’re basically using each other for their own selfish desires. Koito is using Nanami in order to learn how to love. And Nanami is using Koito as a source of comfort. But it’s complicated now as Nanami describes the word “love” to be like shackles. She’s scared of Koito changing, because she’s in love with the Koito now that doesn’t know how to love. If a person changes, then it’s not the same person they fell in love with. If Koito develops feelings for Nanami, then she changes as a person, which means that Nanami won’t be in love with the new Koito. So she desperately wants Koito to never fall in love her. I’m glad that we now know why she fell in love with her, other than the acceptance and comfort. But the dynamic between them is very strange, unique, and kind of unhealthy. Basically, these girls have a lot of issues and I can see a lot of problems for them in the future. The titles for this episode make a lot of sense and represent each girl, too.

It’s very interesting though. Once Koito falls in love with Nanami, are things really going to change? Once Nanami does the student council show for the culture festival, what then? Continue this “perfect” persona forever? And why is it that she was never able to feel this comfort and acceptance from Sayaka? Because Sayaka is able to “love”? This episode was fantastic and really set things up for future episodes and I’m finally feeling like this show is hitting its stride. This episode felt like the end of the first act and the second act is looking to be great.