You know, every week I have trouble watching this show. I push it off more and more just because of the sole reason that this show has disappointed me so much, that it actually depresses me a little bit. Here’s the thing. My first season her I reviewed the show ‘Girlfriend’. In it, absolutely nothing happened in every episode. It was slow, it was dull. However, here’s the thing. ‘Girlfriend’ had no history. I expected nothing going into that show. And even though it was boring and slow, it didn’t disappoint, as I had no expectations. Nurse Witch Komugi however, DID. I still have the original OVA of this show, and it still makes me laugh today. It was a self referential parody of the magical girl genre and it was over the top, and FUNNY. The main problem with this show, is it is so safe, so by the numbers and it sucked every bit of charm out of the original. It is hard to watch this show. It is. Every week I hope in vain that the wit and charm of the original will show through. And it doesn’t. This show is nothing but a painful slow boring mess. But I guess I should review the episodes. Pfff. Fine.
Episode 5 starts up with Komugi about to get an actual speaking role in a TV show. However, her producer sees that she got a 0 on her previous test and tells her that unless she gets her grades up, she can’t be in the show.
Okay look. I’ve gotten bad grades before. I’ve gotten 50’s, 40’s, hell, I got a 32 one time. But how the FUCK do you get a “0”? I have never gotten a 0 on a test i’ve actually taken in my life. I know you’re trying to show that she’s kind of stupid, but NOBODY gets a “0”.
Anyway, Kotori says she’ll help Komugi study. Joining the study group will be brown haired guy and blonde tomboy. The issue is, blonde tomboy has a secret crush on the brown haired guy.
Here’s the biggest problem. Well, there’s 2 actually. 1. They’re taking the fact that she likes him WAY too seriously. They’re playing this up like it’s an actual romance show. IT’S NOT SUPPOSED TO BE. 2. Blonde haired girl annoys me by her mere presence. They had PLENTY of other characters from the original series to choose from. WHY did they feel the need to not only invent her, but make her the focal point of these two episodes? I don’t understand. She shouldn’t even exist.
The rest of the episode is basically the blonde haired girl trying to awkwardly get close to the boy without him noticing. No…really that’s about it. There’s NOTHING to say about this episode. Absolutely nothing happens. Komugi did that thing in “Girlfriend” where she procrastinates studying, Blonde girl tries to make creepy eyes at the brown haired boy, lather rinse repeat. That is pretty much the entire episode.
Komugi goes to take her tests, and in the middle of her English test, gets interrupted by a monster. However, Koyori beats it before she even gets there so….that was entirely pointless.
Komugi still fails her test because she put the bubbles in the wrong line, but the teacher lets her retake it. There you go. There’s the episode.
Episode 6 has more going on than 5. ….then again, that isn’t saying a whole lot.
So blonde haired bitch is sad that she can’t be girly because she has her persona as a tomboy. Komugi overhears her talking about a special card from a card game and thinks she would want it. She gets the card from her brother and goes to look for Koyori. Unfortunately she walks into blonde girl’s room by mistake and sees it’s all girly.
However she doesn’t realize it’s blonde girl’s room and thinks it’s just a random girl’s room. Blonde girl sees her looking into the room however and thinks she’s going to tell everyone and blow her cover. Blonde girl uses this as an opportunity to tell everyone about her girliness after a major even that’s coming up.
The event in question is a spa contest between a bunch of idols. There’s different events and the winning team gets a prize. Everything’s going well until the producer asks brown haired guy to cause a wardrobe malfunction to one of the girls. While thinking it over, one of the monster cards takes over his underwear, thereby possessing him as well. The monster then proceeds to rip off everyone’s clothing.
The guy is saved by blonde girl who transforms and she realizes that Komugi was never going to tell anybody as she didn’t know the room belonged to her. She DOES take this opportunity to tell Komugi about it though even though she backs out of her promise and doesn’t tell the world about it. (I know..shocker, right?) And that’s where the episode ends.
Now here’s the thing. You may think that I’m racing through these recaps, but the honest truth is, not a lot happens in these episodes. There is a lot of talking about absolutely nothing for minutes upon minutes. The episodes are padded with this nothing and it’s very hard to dig through and find anything of value to talk about.
The word i’d have to use for this series is lifeless. There is no soul to this series. It is manufactured, by the numbers schlock.
The only way to describe the creation of this show is that people sat at a table and discussed it at a board meeting. That’s the only thing that makes sense. Most series have a creative spark. A reason to exist. This one…I just don’t see it. Nothing here is done differently. If you have seen a single magical girl show in your life you have seen this one. The only way I could see this even being the remotest bit of funny is if they are making this series on PURPOSE as kind of an anti-joke. It wouldn’t be GOOD but it would at least make sense about why they’re doing this.
Every single thing that was good about this idea was gutted and replaced with beige nothing. It is amazing I can be so pissed at NOTHING. Although, I’m not pissed at the nothing itself, i’m pissed about what the nothing replaced.
Episode 5: 3.5/10
Episode 6: 5/10
Thank god i’m done for a while.
-Hideki