Well….I sure am happy to be back with this show…oh yeah. I bet you can just imagine the excitement in my voice as if I were reading it out loud. And yes. Before I even start this review, I hate Bitch McGee. I hate her with a fiery passion. And I don’t care if the writer likes her. Fuck her. I hate her. She can go die in a fire. In fact, these two episodes are full of so much stupid I could write a book called “You fucking idiot, this is not the way to do things”. Because honestly, these two episodes kind of sucked. But..I digress. Let’s get into the first one.

So the first one starts off with Yuu using her track and field powers to catch up to Ushio and comb his hair.

I like Yuu...she's fun. Why can't the series be about her?
I like Yuu…she’s fun. Why can’t the series be about her?

Tora considers being a dick for a minute but then helps the girls out by assisting blonde girl in combing Ushio’s hair.

There’s a lot of crap this episode about “Oh, can we hold back the eye demons for much longer?” and “Will Ushio return to normal” internal monologues and bladdity blah. Then eventually when it’s just Bitch Mcgee, that ghost lady shows up inside of the spear and is like “Hey, bro. Stop being such a bitch stealing people’s souls and shit” and he’s like “Hmmmm” and while he’s hemming and hawing, she combs his hair.

Bro, mom says to quit being a bitch fuck...also you're grounded.
Bro, mom says to quit being a bitch fuck…also you’re grounded.

Then there’s flashbacks of her being a dick and then he changes back to normal. (God I fucking hate this bitch) He then pulls out his super versioned spear and fucks up the eye demons’ day. And..then because he can’t turn his head sideways because he’s exhausted, can’t tell that all the girls are next to him and starts talking about how he dreamed that he saw them all and gives detailed recaps of how they acted…except for blonde and bitch girl who he says “I think those two were there too..” and then for some reason the girls are like “oh yeah, bitch girl is most important.” and Ushio heads into the cave that the spear was drawing him towards when he was in crazy evil mode and that’s where the episode ends.

I feel like all the important girls I know were there...except there was this other bitch....fuck her.
I feel like all the important girls I know were there…except there was this other bitch….fuck her.

Hey. Question. anybody else remember when the spear was just a thing that pinned Tora to the wall and this was a fun series about killing demons and had nothing to do with an overarching plot involving this spear? (raises hand) anybody else?

This plot is getting very much up its own ass and it’s beginning to annoy me. Also, need I say it again? I hate bitch girl. She actually makes the show worse to watch. I actually get physically pained when she’s onscreen. They’re trying to give bitch girl this “oh, tee hee, i’m an ass, but i really care about-” NO. FUCK YOU. I see the shit you’re trying to pull show. And no. You’re not going to take a character that I fucking despise and try to be like “oh, well, see, she really cares ab-” No. NO. Fuck you and fuck this character.

Aha! She shows her true form!
Aha! She shows her true form!

Also…still pissed about the “combing the hair” thing. The fuck is THAT? Turning into a demon? Better comb that shit! Also, why didn’t ghost chick come into the spear from the BEGINNING to distract him so they could all comb his hair at once, instead of saying “hey, go comb his hair, but i’ll show up at the last second because i’m an asshole like that”. This whole reverting through the use of girl hair combing was really a terrible attempt to get the girls to make a comeback and do something that seems relevant….but it really wasn’t.

Episode 3/10

Oh boy. Now it’s time for my OTHER favorite thing. Honestly, this trope really really pisses me off. And i can’t believe it actually showed up in this show. This is one of the most annoying things in fiction to me. I can’t believe it myself, but….let’s go over the Status quo time travel episode. Oh dear lord help me.

So the next episode starts up with Ushio and Tora heading into the cave where they come across a random temple. Going inside it’s a room with candles. They feel a terrible presence when they see a piece of Hakumen no mono sitting up on the wall. That’s when a random demon pops out and is like “Hello! I am a time traveling demon! Let’s go back in time for some reason!”

Time Traveling for some reason powers...ACTIVATE!
Time Traveling for some reason powers…ACTIVATE!

And so the three of them travel 2200 years into the past in China. And I guess part of his special powers is babelfish because they speak Japanese……for some reason. They kind of brush that away as such. Upon arriving they save ghost lady (who’s alive lady now) who takes them back to her house. They come across the father and mother. Turns out the father is a blacksmith who’s been trying to make a divine sword because the emperor saw Hakumen No Mono and freaked out saying that he needs the best blacksmiths to create a divine sword.

You know it's good! Because it's shiny!
You know it’s good! Because it’s shiny!

So the brother comes back and he and the father work a whole bunch on the sword and apparently the brother heard that if you mix women’s hair into the sword it will be awesome. They make the sword and it is then time to show it to the emperor. Hakumen no mono gets fed up though and kind of just starts killing everyone. Not…sure why he waited so long but I guess he was waiting for Ushio to travel back in time and watch him…..Okay, I have no fucking clue WHY he waited so long, he just did.

The father tries to use the spear but it breaks and he dies. Gee, guess he wasn’t a spirit blacksmith right Meis?

Let's see all two of you that get a Thousand Arms reference
Let’s see all two of you that get a Thousand Arms reference

Then Ushio tries to save the mother but she dies too. Shocker. I know. Yes…I am so shocked. Then the episode ends with Ushio being mad at Hakumen No Mono.

Grr! I'm mad at you...you..whatever the fuck you are
Grr! I’m mad at you…you..whatever the fuck you are

Honestly, this episode falls into the WORST trap time travel stories can fall into. The status quo time travel plot. This is when a piece of fiction introduces Time travel and only uses it to show that things happened exactly the way they supposedly had to and nothing can alter the future/present. I. FUCKING. HATE these stories. This right here is EXACTLY the reason Stein’s Gate crapped itself and died halfway through the series. It started out really awesome, and then had a stroke and died all over the floor.

This? This right here? Accurate portrayal of the second half of Stein's Gate. to be fair, seeing kurisu stabbed makes me warm and tingly inside.
This? This right here? Accurate portrayal of the second half of Stein’s Gate. to be fair, seeing kurisu stabbed makes me warm and tingly inside. Yeah that’s right i fucking hate her too.

If you are going to have time travel involved at ALL in your show, you have to have the present/future be fluid and let things be changed. If you don’t, it’s a useless, boring mess. And this is the case with this episode. You know NOTHING is going to change in the future, so what’s the point of having him go back in the past? He could have just watched a power point presentation and it would have had the same effect. If there is time travel, things have to be alterable.

These two episodes just pissed me off. They’re making Hakumen no Mono to be this big deal and why the spear was invented in the first place and shit. I just remember when a dude stabbed Tora to a wall…that was good enough for me! Whatever. Fuck these two episodes man…

Episode 3/10

Bitches and shitty time travel……..man……….

-Hideki

This Post Has One Comment

  1. higgsbosoff

    Uhm, bitch girl aside… what’s similar between this use of time travel and Steins;Gate’s? Here time travel is used mostly as an exposition device. For all we know it could more be a “vision” of the past Ushio is experiencing, albeit sort of in first person, than an actual time travel. The point is he gets to experience his enemy first hand – it’s supposed to be more like a training experience. Maybe it’s a limit of the demon’s power itself, if he could achieve proper, full time travel he’d be way too broken a power and it would also leave a huge plot hole about why didn’t anyone think about using that ability to go back and stop Hakumen no Mono when it was born, or getting the Beast Spear when they didn’t know where it was, or something. In Steins;Gate time travel was full-fledged, and the past COULD be changed, it’s just that not any change was quite enough to affect the one consequence Kyouma cared about (Mayuri dying).

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