“I’m so upset… I’m so upset I could die.”
Impression
I really wasn’t expecting a Kumiko episode this late in the game – but by the time it was over, I was really glad they put one in. After all, Kumiko is supposed to be the main character! And she’s gained a lot of inspiration after watching Reina at the auditions – “I want to be special like you”, she tells her. At the start of the series, Kumiko tried to sneak her way out of playing the euphonium, and was even unsure of whether to join the concert band or not. But now, after an audition and lots of internal conflict in the band, her feelings have fully translated into motivation. She feels strongly enough to rehearse with the band from early morning to sunset, and to practice by herself until her nose bleeds from dehydration. It was looking pretty bad for a minute there actually, I was worried this would turn into a surprise drama at the hospital. Featuring a distraught Reina holding her hand and crying over her intubated body, of course.
It’s this sort of development that makes Kumiko feel more like a main character and more than just a narrator – a spectator of the various conflicts in the band, and an occasional participant in a romantic yuri tryst. Now, she’s undoubtedly trying her very best to become as good as possible, even in the face of a sudden challenge (one that Asuka seems to be able to sight-read almost instantly, to my simultaneous admiration and annoyance). Hazuki and Midori comment that she has more intensity, like she’s reaching for the moon, and her family aren’t fond of how she keeps bringing her euphonium back home for practice. Reina offers emotional support in turning up to her practice sessions and trumpeting along with her. And what’s most telling is that Kumiko now feels frustrated with those around her who have less dedication – for example, Aoi-chan stopped because she “no longer had a reason to continue”, which makes it sound like she only did it because she was obliged or was forced to. Onee-chan stopped because she wasn’t aiming for music school – essentially because there was no practical goal in her continuing. It implies she didn’t enjoy it of her own volition, and honestly reminds me of how many parents make their kids learn an instrument for exactly the same reason, with the child themselves being all too happy to quit after meandering through the obligatory grades. If they quit because they lose interest, then fine. But forcing them through it because it looks good on paper is not the way to go. As someone who has continued with music to this day for it’s own sake, I have to say, I bristled at onee-chan’s words.
It’s precisely because Kumiko put all her effort into tackling this part that her ensuing failure hurt so badly. And as we’ve watched her struggle, it hurts us too – and it’s not just a music thing. I think anyone who’s experienced a major failure in general despite trying their very best can relate to how Kumiko felt as she ran through the streets and cried tears of frustration. It’s not like she’s been axed from playing at the competition completely – it’s just a certain part, and it’s a loss the rational side of her accepts as necessary in order to make it to Nationals. But it’s the other side of a challenge she put her all into overcoming, and she still didn’t make it nonetheless. I think they didn’t actually have to overtly reference what Reina said in the first episode – a lot of people must have immediately recognized those lines as Reina’s, and realized that Kumiko now understands just how painful it felt for her when they achieved a dud gold. All is, of course, not lost! But I do wonder what Taki-sensei was thinking. He never said anything to Kumiko during the rehearsal where he axed her, and he never told her to speak with him afterwards – he says he remembers her words about being able to do it, but was he planning to give her another chance all along?
(As a side note, I was happy that Shuichi stayed on his side of the street during Kumiko’s moment of anguish. As well as his side of the river. I mean, he could have tried crossing, but then we’d have needed a timely appearance by Truck-kun. And that’s even more unlikely than a Kumiko x Reina end. Beautiful animation though.)
