Death Parade ~Episode 12 [Suicide Tour] Final

The last time I was this emotional about the ending of a series, was Zankyou no Terror. However, that was only the last few minutes of the episode. I sobbed the ENTIRE EPISODE. This is an episode of feelings so strong, that any time I even thought about trying to stop crying, I just started crying again. There was no happiness to be found in this episode. Well, maybe. If you aren’t me, and weren’t on the sinking Decim/Chiyuki ship.

If there is one thing that always get’s me, it’s seeing a family’s reaction to the death of a loved one. So, my soul is slowly destroyed by the fact we get to see Chiyuki’s mother at her shrine, making her meals still, praying for her and crying. Watching Chiyuki break down and apologizing for not cherishing her own life. So, as we see this, her house, her room and bits of time with her parents.

Let’s be real here, I can’t imagine the pain of having to outlive your child. So, as we view this. Decim hands her one of the remotes from the judgements and tells her that if she presses the button, she can live, but someone else will die. She trembles, almost going to press the button. Then she remembers all the guests at Quindecim. How they all had people they loved, people who loved them, friends, family.
I know last episode, Ginti pulled a similar trick with Mayu. However, this time you could feel it all the more. The question and moral ideas between taking your life in place of another. Is it right? Is it wrong?

Out of the thousands of people who die on a daily basis, could you exchange their life for yours? Well, Chiyuki, can’t. As she remembers all the people who have passed through Quindecim she realizes that everyone has someone who loves them, someone like her mother. Sitting there, sobbing and crying. However, even as she knows this. She still wants to see her mother, still wants to apologize to her.

She takes the device and slams it at Decim, telling him to push it. Then, he breaks down. He feels sorrow, he feels awful for deceiving her. As it’s revealed that this is part of her judgement. He falls to his knees crying, he just wanted to know more about her. See more about her, okay. I may not be the expert on dummies implanted with human emotions who are suddenly coming into them for the first time.
But that’s love, he loves her. He loves her so much, as they stand in the dummy grave yard. The resting place of the dummies after their judgement is done.

Chiyuki walks with him, asking if this is where she’ll go after her judgement is passed. He says no, they approach Clavis and take the elevator back up to Quindecim.
We see her get into the elevator with the reincarnation mask. Her and Decim speak, he asks her if she was happy that she lived. She says yes, he replies that he wants to be the kind of Arbiter that can have all of his visitors say that.
She suggests that for a start, he smile. He tries and it’s an absolute train wreck, she sighs and tells him to just work on it. Then, the doors close slowly. She smiles at him, and he smiles back. Not the creepy smile he’d had a moment ago, but a genuine, happy smile.

As the ending passes, we see Ginti and Clavis talking. I still haven’t forgiven him for what he did to Mayu. We see Nona, who’d been in trouble with Oculus the entire episode with some of the other females. As they list the rules of being an Arbiter. The last thing we see, is two new guests to Quindecim. As they come in, they see Decim. Welcoming them, with a smile. A doll of Chiyuki, sitting off to the side.

Times I broke down crying writing this post?: 5

This ending killed me, I sobbed for the entire episode. I believe I may of stopped briefly during one of the scenes with Nona and Oculus talking. I could not, handle, anything in this episode. I am sitting here now, thinking of this dubbed and I just…can’t. My heart will shatter. I loved this show, I love this ship, why did it have to sink like this? Okay, I know the answer. Because she was human and he wasn’t.
I am depressed by the idea of suicide, i am depressed by the idea of outliving your child. I am depressed by the idea of love that can not be. This episode was beautiful, but depressing. It hurt, but I loved it. This is the most confusing series ending i’ve ever seen!

I just, CAN’T, WITH THIS. BECAUSE, THEY CAN NEVER BE. WHY NOT? I MEAN, LOOK, AT HOW CUTE THEY ARE TOGETHER. SO CUTE, MUCH LOVE. WHY DEATH PARADE? WHY CAN’T YOU, JUST THROW ME, A BONE. Oh well…

This series was good, it probably won’t become a classic but it was a good view. The animation was always pretty, the stories were always good, and I can’t…with this ending. My heart is actually in shards, I’m not joking when I said I cried five times while writing this, on top of the 27 minutes I cried during the episode. I think the underlying issues in this series are with a flawed system.
There is also a lot of strong comments on human nature that the series addresses.

However, the sub-plot of the flawed system takes a complete back seat to the story of a man discovering emotions for the first time through the help of a beautiful, wonderful girl. Which is why I ship this, I ship it hard. Decim and Chiyuki are perfect for each other. The one who rejected understanding the feelings of those around her and a man who isn’t sure what emotion is.

It was only 12 episodes but I felt a lot of things, my only regrets are that Clavis didn’t get more screen time. However, where in some shows, a lack of character development bothers me.

I have so much more I could write, I will make a final impressions post soon.

~MidnightDevont