Cardfight!! Vanguard Legion Mate episode 192 + 193 [ Absolute Break ]

Aichi wakes up and seems ready to duel, but Gaillard begs for a chance to redeem himself. He swears he will defeat Kai on his honor as a Quatre Knight. . and I’m scared shitless because I have no idea how this will end. Gaillard doesn’t use his prison this time…and the battle begins.

The show juxtaposes this fight to the people who were beaten and lost their memories. Then it allows us to see Kourin and Aichi as they watch the duel. The importance of this fight is not lost as it feels like everyone is watching, even the people who have forgotten it’s importance. I don’t know where the FRACKIN SHOW IS GONNA FRACKIN GO FROM HERE..AND WHY ARE THERE MOVIE CARDS? DOES THAT MEAN WE’RE GONNA SEE BLASTER JOKER???

Seeing Aichi watch this and seem so set in that it must be done, I want to cry. I HAVE SO MANY AICHI FEELINGS, OKAY? SO MANY BROKEN HEARTED AICHI FEELINGS. And..and am I…am I a nerd for reciting Kai’s legion speech? All of his speeches? I like Kai okay. I HAVE ISSUES.  Kai manages to use his legion for 31k, but gets perfect guarded. He twin drives and…DID HE JUST GET THREE FUCKING HEAL TRIGGERS IN THE FIRST 10 MINUTES? Sorry bro you’re fucked…or maybe the last one will come up important now. OR HE’S FUCKED.

Gaillard uses the Aglovale Legion to Superior call and use Bruno, and his skill prevents Kai from guarding with grade one or higher. AGLOVALE YOU CHEAP BIUTCH. Then again Kai did..did just get three heal triggers so. . . he has three 10k abilities. …AND HE USED ALL THREE OF THEM HAHAHAAHHA. Then he summons MOTHER FUCKING PERDITION EMPEROR…FROM THE MOVIE…MY GOD.

He manages to get a critical trigger and then …….gets guarded…BUT THEN GETS ANOTHER CRITICAL AND GIVES IT TO…JESUS  KAI EVEN NAOKI WONDERS WHAT THE FUCK IS WITH THESE TRIGGERS???? Naoki jinxes the fight and Gaillard uses his a fifth heal trigger THANK YOU LEGION for him.

…THE FUCK IS THIS GAME? EVERYTHING. TRIGGERS EVERYWHERE. KAI TRIGGERS EVERYWHERE. HE TRIGGERS LIKE ME ON TUMBLR. HE TRIGGERS LIKE AN EXPLOSION GOING OFF IN JINXES LEAGUE OF LEGENDS PROMO. AND THEN HE FINAL TURNS. OF COURSE HE DOES. BECAUSE THERE ARE NO MORE TRIGGERS. THE TRIGGERS NO LONGER EXIST. THERE ARE NO MORE TRIGGERS IN THE UNIVERSE.  SO GAILLARD LOSES ironically like Kai usually does at this point for lack of heal triggers.

Aichi knows he has to fight Kai now, but this is A TERRIBLE IDEA. HE IS GLOWING AND EVERYTHING. CAN’T THEY JUST FUCKING SIT DOWN AND HAVE TEA? IS THIS REALLY A GOOD IDEA? NO IT ISN’T.

Aichi and Kai finally talk about shit that they should’ve talked about fucking forever ago. He even explains that the more he wins the more Link Joker takes over…DID I FUCKING MENTION WHY THIS IS A TERRIBLE IDEA???? IT’S A FUCKING AWFUL IDEA. IF HE LOSES KAI WILL GO CRAZY AND IF HE WINS HE’LL LOSE HIS SHIT AND BECOME LINK JOKER INCARNATE AICHI YOU FUCKING IDGETnjdfkghdljkg DONT FUCKING PLAY THE CARD GAME

Aichi chews out Ren and Leon (as much as you can chew someone out) and insists this is the only way but that is so fucking stupid. DOES LINK JOKER DECREASE YOUR BRAIN POWER? IS IT LIKE DAYS WITHOUT TOUCHING YOURSELF? I’m so upset right now, there is no reason for this shit. And- OH GOD. OH GOD. BLASTER JOKER FUCK IM SCARED OUT OF MY PANTS. I’M SCARED AND ANGRY. Aichi asks that when he wins, Kai, Naoki, Ren, and Leon to become his next Quatre Knights. Kai says “lol sure but i aint gonna lose”

The battle is at a virtual draw until Kai summons Dragonic Overlord- his avatar. Then Aichi rides Imaginary Plane Dragon and knocks down some shit, gets a crit, and gives it to Photon, but Kai had TWO MOTHER FUCKIN PERFECT GUARDS. He really doesn’t want to wear that Quatre Knights outfit huh? (aichi: WHY DON’T YOU THINK I’M GOOD AT FASHION DESIGN??)

Aichi basically admits he just didn’t think Kai wouldn’t have made it here, but Kai says that he has changed. He changed because of Aichi! The battle for Link Joker, all for the sake of winning, showed him just how meaningless winning is in comparison to his friends. He calls his Legion and gets a critical to give to overlord, retires a rear guard, and re stands his guard because he attacked a rear guard. Perfect guards occur AGAIN and he gets a dr..draw trigger? WOW HEY IS IT SEASON ONE AGAIN???

Kai tells Aichi how hard all their friends fought and how badly they wanted to see him. He even says that he is his mate above all else too, and Aichi says he understands. It was pointless, though, Aichi resolves. Uh. . . he starts going Link Joker crazy and..THE FUCK DID I TELL ALL OF YOU THIS WAS A BAD IDEA THIS WAS A SHITTY IDEA he summons Blaster Joker and it’s legion.

His legion skill is to ABSOLUTE LOCK…AND THEN ABSOLUTE BREAK, RETIRING NEOFLAME OH MY FUCK HE BROKE HIS LEGION HE RETIRED A VANGUARD I’M SO FUCKING SCARED GUYS????? THAT’S WHERE THE FUCKING EPISODE ENDS??? THAT’S THE FUCKING ENDING? HE FUCKING *RETIRES A VANGUARD AND HIS LEGION IS TAKEN DOWN* UNLESS HE FUCKING RIDES A NEW VANGUARD HE CAN’T HAVE A LEGION OH MY FUCKING GOD HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO FUCKING BREATHE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK

THIS IS ONLY A CARD GAME OKI, ONLY A CARD GAME, STOP LOSING YOUR GRIP ON YOUR SANITY IT’S OKAY, OH GOD, NEXT WEEK ISN’T CLOSE OR FAR ENOUGH. WHAT DID THEY DO, WHY WOULD YOU MAKE BLASTER JOKER SO FUCKING SCARY?!!?! please join me next week as I wet my pants.

Oki