Shingeki no Kyojin [ep 15] prelude to MY GOD HANJI YOU FABULOUS BABE

This week continues the prelude to stuff and the hype and build up for some major bad*** shit gonna be happenin soon, but mostly importantly-

Hanji Zoe Everybody!

This week’s episode is a continuation of the minute movement of the show since the recap. It’s like I’ve been watching this show and seeing the murder, blood, mayhem- get a hold of it and it’s all character motivated. Thank God Hanji is SUPER COOL so I don’t really mind, but they’re hyping up the epic of the Recon squad and I BETTER GET SOME ACTION SOON OR I WILL …PROBABLY JUST OPT TO DRAW PORN OF PEOPLE not even gonna lie it’s not like I’ll stop watching IT’S STILL GOOD EVEN WHEN IT’S SLOW.

 

Guys, guys, I know what you’re all thinking. But Oki, the plot! The plot! Talk about the plot! Okay here is the plot, Eren is currently Levi’s cleaning bitch and he’s terrible at it

Do you fucking see Levi’s face? He is motherfucking DISPLEASED with this shit. GET OUT THE CLOROX, SCRUB THAT BITCH, GIRL, THAT AIN’T EVEN HOW YOU CLEAN. And so to spare the pain and torment of Levi’s midget rage fueled cleaning frenzy, Eren is suddenly thrust into the hands of the crazy and Titan obsessed Hanji Zoe-

I don’t know about any evidence in show of shipping yet, but let’s be for real. Levi has to at least respect Hanji if he’ll allow her to get her grubby hands on Eren. Though to be fair, it might just be a form of punishment. “HEY I’M GONNA MAKE THIS GUY SUFFER WAY MORE THAN YOU EVER COULD” “HOW BY BEATING THE SHIT OUT OF HIM?” “NO HANJI WILL TELL HIM ABOUT HER EXPERIMENTS” “You got it.”

Most of this episode IS in fact just introducing the members of the Recon squad and telling us how ferocious they are. The second half is just Hanji and her revealed experimentation on titans. But Hanji has a unique approach to titans, she seems to treat them like pets and respect them as a life form. Her entire purpose of getting ahold of Eren is to communicate appropriately with them and learn more about them. We also learn subtle titan facts like how titans bodies weigh a lot lighter than they should, and that’s super cool. . . . . almost as cool as if we saw some beating the shit out of titans.

Hanji has gone to the extent of naming the Titans, and Eren eventually decides that the entire Recon squad is a bunch of loons. But while deciding this, he also notes they most want change, and decides to ask Hanji about her experiments. They’re up all night with nothing new being divulged, until morning rolls around and to Hanji’s utter dismay, the captured Titans have been murdered. She freaks the fuck out and Eren is then subtly whispered to by Levi’s assistant that OH WHO DO YOU THINK IT WAS because YEAH IT WAS TOTALLY SOMEONE IN THE RANKS?? So SPOILERS, BITCHES BE DOING STUFF.

My God guys, I love this show but I could not be given less entertaining stuff to talk about. I mean, Hanji’s part was so fun to watch and her character is so good it was worth watching, but come on

come oooooon

come oooooon

this is attack on Titan!

you see this girl?!

I shouldn’t be thinking she’s super kawaii and shit, I should be thinking WOW I LOVE WATCHING HER MURDER THINGS! I should be seeing her nearly get eaten and beat the shit out of things !! come on man BEATING THE SHIT OUT OF THINGS

Anyway, so Hanji freaks out, Eren is freaking out, everyone is freaking out –

Next week we’ll see PEOPLE FREAK OUT ABOUT THE MURDER OF TITAN SUBJECTS! EREN STILL BEING USELESS! MIKASA AND ARMIN PLAYING BLACKJACK, AND HOOKERS, AND FINDING OUT THEIR POSITION IN LIVES. In fact, forget the blackjack, and the positions, hookers for everyone!

Oki