Alright, so the mood of this episode is absolutely ruined because of one thing: How do I take anything seriously when I look at this face? The tone of this episode is melancholy, with the focus being Eren’s growth. His depression has morphed him into a more steadfast character determined to do hard things without grit or anger to fuel him, simply determination. But that is the face I see in my head when I think of this anime now. You’re all welcome this is what will haunt my dreams forever. There was a beautiful scene between Eren and Historia and then it resulted in an even more hysterical face:

Mikasa is always so beautiful and mildly terrifying.

How do I reach these kids? Mikasa, my child, chill. As for the rest of the episode, there are so many flashbacks and sleuthing moments about Eren’s dad and the secrets of his life that we all know what has to be coming. But it was agonizing to get through most of it because it teetered so heavily on a clip show. Did I need to see all of it? I was so thankful when it cut to real moments of Eren’s father’s life. Hearing him call the Scouts the brightest part of humanity made me tear up. He would be so proud of his tiny angry bean, trying to save humanity.

When he met Carla, too, made me want to pet them. I want to pull them all into a happy ‘nothing bad happens here’ gift basket and let them hug. This poor devastated family and their horrible fates makes me a sad tiny panda. It’s hard to shake how bad it felt to watch Carla die at the very beginning of the show and this episode does make the pain linger. And seeing her relationship to character’s we’ve seen this entire time did make me feel there was great world building to think about.

Learning the truth was another thing entirely. Eren saw his dad shortly after the attack that killed his mother! But we as viewers have no knowledge of this being the case?! His dad declares he must avenge his mother, something he has no memory of being told and takes him to the woods. Keith follows them, his heart broken for Carla, but he knows he is not special enough to make a difference in this world. After Eren and his father are gone for a while, a flash of lightning summons Keith back to the forest. But there he finds only Eren. After he recounts this story Eren laments that he is not special, merely the son of a special man. But Keith tells him what his mother said when he accused her of not being special,

“Is it wrong not to be special? When it comes to my child, it’s fine if he’s never great. Besides, just look at him. He’s so cute! He’s already special…because he was born into this world.” With those words of encouragement, Eren rides forward to reclaim the wall. I think all of us should try to take Carla’s words to heart, for me they reminded me of the small fragments of hope the series seldom shows.

While I think it’s clear what happened between Eren and his father that day, we’ll have to wait and see. 😉

Oki