Wow. Just wow. This episode. I don’t THINK the intended result of this episode was to make me laugh..but my god. I have to say that I laughed at this episode a few times. And honestly, in places I don’t think I should have. What is so unintentionally funny about this episode? You know what? Let’s just start it up.

Okay, so the episode begins with the Emperor of the world that attacked Japan talking to his senate. It turns out that the battle in Japan was a complete and total loss, with about half of the troops of this army being decimated. about HALF. Remember that. So… what does everyone in the senate think the best course of action would be? Is it

A. Wonder why we were attacking them in the first place calling attention to the Emperor’s idiocy

B. Realize we’re outgunned and try to talk to the people opening a line of communication

C. Perform research on these people to figure out just who the fuck they are.

D. Despite the fact that the last time we fought we got obliterated, draft more guys and attack them with no knowledge of who they are and what kind of weaponry that have at their disposal.

vlcsnap-2015-07-10-21h32m28s649vlcsnap-2015-07-10-21h33m10s0592I… I just…I don’t think I even need to say anything. This episode is literally doing the stupid FOR me. I just…why? Why would anyone want to do this? In what universe of rational thought is the response to “We know nothing about this army from another world which all of our attacks have been effective, so let’s send EVERYONE at it!” Fuck recon, fuck communication. We literally tried to fuck up these people’s world, got fucked up, and now we’re trying to fight AGAIN despite the fact that we KNOW they’re going to whoop our ass.

No, no really, I see NOTHING wrong with this plan. nothing at all.

But just in case, I want you to just GUESS what happens. Just guess what happens when the army with swords and arrows tries to fight the people with tanks and guns. Just guess.

If you guessed THIS

vlcsnap-2015-07-10-21h41m22s474Then congratulations. You were 100% right. Because fighting against tanks with people is fucking stupid.

After they lose ANOTHER 50,000ish people, the emperor’s like “oh good, now that I had the people from other countries get their asses kicked, they don’t have armies to fight me anymore.” Wait…you mean including the shit ton of your own people in the first battle who got owned? I just… why? Hang on, I have a new face for this guy.

there2Ah. See, NOW it makes sense.

In the aftermath of the battle, our main character then gets put in charge of a squadron to do some investigating into this world as well as make friends with the locals.

Now, I know a lot of you who know about this show were wondering. How do they portray America? Isn’t this show super patriotic? Don’t worry. They manage throw in some “America’s a bunch of assholes” clip.

Pfff! They even have the president doing the Genki Ikari hand pose. Subtle guys. subtle
Pfff! They even have the president doing the Genki Ikari hand pose. Subtle guys. subtle

Honestly, I can’t even be offended at this. It’s so stupid and over the top, it’s like watching one of our own “Proud to Be an American” videos where we’re like “we are the greatest country ever. Fuck everyone else.” Basically the president’s view is “We should go over there and take all their resources! Because we’re Americans!” To be honest, we’re not much better in some of the way WE portray Japanese villains.

Anywho, the group heads out and after meeting up with some townspeople they see a dragon wiping out a town. (I am assuming the dragon is from the emperor who wanted to slash and burn all the towns that the Japanese people might come across because…they’re assholes like that)

Only one country can take care of this. "Japan! Fuck Yeah! Gonna save the mother fucking day yeah!"
Only one country can take care of this. “Japan! Fuck Yeah! Gonna save the mother fucking day yeah!”

They seem to find no survivors, however as they reach a well, they peer inside and sees what looks like a girl who’s still alive.

Hey, is she dead? Op, nope, wait she's in the theme song. She's all right everyone!
Hey, is she dead? Op, nope, wait she’s in the theme song. She’s all right everyone!

and that’s where the episode ends.

To be honest, I can see where everyone’s ‘Ultra nationalistic’ ideas about this show comes from. If this show loved its country anymore, the main character’s name would be “Nihonga Daisuki” However, as I said, I find it more amusing than annoying. It’s like watching “Team America”. It’s not bad, it’s just hilarious in that way.

What I find BAD is Emperor idiot and his band of retards killing all their own men for no reason against an enemy that they have NO idea what the fuck they’re up against. The whole time watching these battles I kept playing the “Benny Hill” theme in my head. It’s not dramatic or sad, it’s just hilarious because of how stupid their military is.

That's basically the entire battle scene
That’s basically the entire battle scene

The biggest problem besides that that I had with this episode is that we spent so much time with this nonsense that we really didn’t meet any of the girl characters (except the one who’s unconscious and the other who wants daddy’s love)

Oh yeah. Forgot to mention her. She’s the emperor’s hot daughter. Because you know…they always have those.

Why won't you love me daddy?!
Why won’t you love me daddy?!

With that, it wasn’t a bad episode, it just dragged its feet for quite a bit and i’m not sure what’s supposed to be the emperor’s plan. Is it to get everyone killed? Because if that’s the case, he’s doing a damn good job of it.

Episode 5/10

Oh. and also, really guys…. the American president wouldn’t be speaking in Japanese. Just saying.

-Hideki

This Post Has 4 Comments

  1. I.D. nameless

    Time for the empire to get its shit together and create a weapon against the invaders in the form of a special drug than can only be administered to teenage girls. And then make a school for training such girls that are capable of fighting against the army from beyond the gate. And then one random super nice guy takes the drug thanks to the stupidity of the tsundere and guess what – it miraculously works on him. And then he enrols at said school and everyone wants…a piece of him, much to the tsundere’s chagrin…. TO BE CONTINUED

    1. Plinfan

      Wow, I have never heard of such a unique plot in my live, lol.
      So I guess this is like a Call of Duty game for japan, with the exeption that the villan is even for this kind of scenario exeptioanal stupid. Its basiclly like "hurr durr, I gonna profe how much of a scumbag I am by not only getting my army desimated ones but TWICE, for some getting more controll of my contry cause that makes sence, derp". I predict the japanise heros to beat the (incompetent idiot) evil emporer while saving the poor population from the greedy amarikans, like I said Call of duty-japan edition, same shit, diffrent flag. Lets hope it stays at least entertainingly bad and the masage isn`t too bad to swallow.

      PS: I also noticed that we have a high tech army invading a contry with lower technological level with the goal to “liberate” the supresst people. Where did I hear that before?

  2. João Carlos

    The problem with the Empire is that they have no idea how deadly are our modern weapons. They just assume they are fighting against magic from their world and the Empire conquered a lot of nations fighting against “normal” magic.

    The Empire have a case of deadly hubris….

  3. zztop

    In one way, the Emperor’s move makes sense – Since my country’s militarily depleted now, I’m going to drag down the other countries to my level so they’re worse off than me.
    Plus I hear the Emperor’s meant to be a calculative a-hole like that; he’s more concerned about shoring up his power base instead of dealing with the Japanese army.

    The Euro-fantasy look Empire people have comes from the light novel illustrations. The novels and manga depict them as historical-type Romans with togas and Caesar haircuts.

    And if you think the Americans look bad here, wait till the Chinese show up.

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