This episode we learn the important truth behind Eren’s powers. And by that I mean TEA AND CRUMPETS TEA AND CRUMPETS EREN’S GOT A BAG OF STRUMPETS

[HorribleSubs] Shingeki no Kyojin - 19 [480p].mkv_20130817_221902

WHO ARE GOING TO KILL HIM IF HE DOESN’T STOP FUCKING SHIT UP.  I’m pretty sure Hanji is this close to sexual torture. ANYWAY THIS WEEK IS A FLASHBACK EPISODE, THAT IS KIND OF SUPER WEIRD. They’re riding on horses as usual because you know horses. Equestrian fetish. My little ponies. Delicious pony titans. SOMETHING. I MIGHT BE LOSING BRAIN CELLS FROM HOLDING MY BREATH WAITING FOR SHIT TO HAPPEN, SO EXCUSE ME IF MY REFERENCES DON’T MAKE SENSE.

MY HAND TASTES LIKE WAFFLES mmm waffles
MY HAND TASTES LIKE WAFFLES mmm waffles

 

Basically blah blah Eren has to trust the Survey corps and not fuck shit up because they have plans but he wants to go Titan on them and has to flashback to remember what’s important and not to go fucking stupid on them. Anyway in the flashback he tries to go Gho-. . . I mean Titan, but he can’t. IT’S NOT LIKE HE WANTS TO TURN INTO YOU TITAN-SAN, BAKA.

 

YOU'RE NOT MY REAL DAD TITAN-SAMA
YOU’RE NOT MY REAL DAD TITAN-SAMA

Anyway after a mishap with his delicious tea and scones, Eren realizes he needs to have intent behind his actions. Everyone freaks out on him, the recon corps is scared. . . . .it takes forever to explain something incredibly small and monotonous. I CAN’T STOP MAKING FUN OF THIS ANIME BECAUSE I WANT TO LIKE IT BUT IT’S LIKE IF YOU ADAPTED EVERY HARRY POTTER BOOK WITH EVERY SCENE AND MADE IT LONGER. Sure it’d be faithful but fucking enjoy your 100 hour TV series that only covers half the first book. A SNAIL MOVES FASTER THAN THIS.

[HorribleSubs] Shingeki no Kyojin - 19 [480p].mkv_20130817_221207

Hanji is fabulous and so is Levi in this episode. . . . but it’s. . . . it’s nothing. We learn like 4 minutes worth of content for 3 episodes. THIS IS RIDICULOUS oh well at least this anime is still pretty. AND IT’S NOT LIKE I CAN’T MAKE EPIC AMVS OR YOU KNOW….SEE THEM….AT THIS RATE. . . . . . .BECAUSE…..YEAH. . . . . YEAH. LETS…YEAH. Hanjiiiiiiii. I wish there was more to talk about in this show right now. More to do but this is the summary.

“Eren has issues trusting the Recon Corps and can’t stand letting the Feminine Titan kill his comrades! He recalls having to trust them when an incident makes them believe he transformed against the will of the Commander, when he truly just needed intent behind injury in order to turn into a Titan. Eren decides to trust the Recon Corps and they end up able to capture the Feminine Titan with a trap, while Levi declares he will capture the Titan.” See, now that would be a great summary. If it was a summary. IF IT EXCLUDED ANYTHING. IF IT WASN’T ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING IN THIS EPISODE. THIS IS ALL THERE IS. NOW YOU KNOW CONGRATULATIONS.

I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS WEEKS EPISODE OF: GETTING STUFF DONE: THE MOTION PICTURE. VOLUME 3 (IT’S NOT DONE YET BUT WE’RE GETTING THERE).

next week: I SWEAR TO GOD JUST FUCKING DO IT ALREADY /curbstomps this pacing
next week: I SWEAR TO GOD JUST FUCKING DO IT ALREADY /curbstomps this pacing

Next week on Attack on Titan. .  . .what it’s been every week! Waiting for the one episode where shit finally happens. HOORAY!

Oki